Loving someone who is diagnosed with depression is tough because you’ll never know when it will hit them. One day you are doing fine and the next not so good. This can be frustrating at times especially when you are not really sure on what to do or say for fear that you might add more to their depressive state. So what can you do when your partner is suffering from depression?
1. Saying “You’ll be fine,” “Just get out of the house,” and even “it’ll get better” isn’t helping at all.
It’s easy for people to say these things to a person who is depressed because they don’t really know what’s going on in that person’s head. When you say these things, you are creating a feeling of inadequacy making them retreat further into depression. It’s much better to give them a hug or make them feel that you are there for them without saying much.
2. They appreciate people reaching out.
It’s easy enough to assume that those who are in a depressive state want to be left alone. On the contrary, being alone isn’t recommended as it can push them to do something they’ll regret later on. If your loved one or partner in life is suffering from depression, instead of staying away from them, find ways to engage them to get them out of their funk.
3. You can be frustrated.
A lot of people tend to walk on eggshells around a person who has depression because they don’t want to aggravate a depressed person more. Unfortunately, this can yield to resentment in the long run. Caring for someone who is depressed is commendable but once you start feeling that your life is becoming negative, it is alright to show your frustration but still find ways to show that person that someone cares for them.
4. They are not broken, damaged, or has defects.
Everyone has flaws no matter how hard they try to hide it. Many make the assumption that just because a person is depressed he or she doesn’t have any real value any more. Diagnosing depression is not correlated to the quality of the person being treated. In order to keep the depressed person happy, simply look at them as a whole including any flaws that you see. If you look beyond their illness and accept them for who they are, you’ll be able to guide them to better health.
5. Don’t create ultimatums.
Couples tend to give out ultimatums to their partners when they are no longer happy or want instant changes. You can’t expect to get the same results when you give an ultimatum to someone who is depressed. Tough love is all well and good but when it comes to dealing with a depressed partner it’s either you break up or find ways to help him or her with her condition.
Loving someone who is depressed is not an easy thing to do but it can be rewarding once you see marked improvements on their behavior, their attitude, and their ability to engage people into conversations. By following the tips mentioned above, you’ll be able to make your relationship stronger than before.